"It take's courage to grow up and be who you really are."
~ e.e. cummings



I haven't written a post in over 2 months. I know some of you hang on my every word and have probably been having panic attacks due to my absence. Too those people, I'm sorry. To the rest of you, deal with it!

Actually, a lot has happened in the last 2 months. I moved to a condo in S. Provo where I only have one roommate and I'm pretty much allowed to be myself and do what I want (boo to BYU approved housing!!). I've started classes again and by the end of the semester I'll be a few steps closer to an associates degree. It's not much but it's a move in the right direction.

And last but not least, after much thought and consideration and trust in my instincts, I've left the LDS church. I know that's a big thing to put in a blog, especially one that's read by family and friends, many of who are LDS. So far, my family and friends who know (both LDS and non-LDS) have been supportive. I didn't jump into this lightly. I've been thinking about this for about 3 years and I had to be honest with myself about how I felt about the church and my beliefs. My befliefs about lots of issues differ greatly from those of the church. I still think the church teaches some good values and I know many great and wonderful people who are memebers. I want you to know that I don't hate the church or it's memebers. And I understand if it's hard from some people to understand why I left, but I hope that doesn't change any of my relationships with any of my friends or family.

I was going to write a whole lot more but once I started it sounded all weird so I decided to stop for today. But I'll try to write more, especially about some recipes I'll be trying out and some new projects I'll be getting into.

This video is from THS Investigates: Diet Fads.
A very brief overview of vegan ism and raw food eating.

In honor of Earth Day, Yoga Journal made
it's May issue free online through Zinio Digital Magazines.

Zinio Digital Magazines is an online service where you can get subscriptions or download individual issues of magazines. The subscriptions are cheaper (since there isn't the cost of paper, etc), but the individual issues can be a few dollars more than what you would pay at the store. The subscriptions or issues you pay for can be download and read at a later time.

There isn't a huge selection, especially for things I'd want (Martha Stewart, etc), but there are common beauty magazines and of course, Yoga Journal.

If you're looking for a way to cut back on the amount of paper you use, this is a great way to do so. And if more people use Zinio, then you'll probably be seeing more magazines offered.

Wherever we may come alive, that is the area in which we are spiritual. - David Steindl-Rast


I've had a lot on my mind for the last month
(actually for quite some time but it came to a head in the past month).
I've been thinking about where I'm going, who I am, what I want out of life, etc.

My spirituality is something that keeps coming up. I've gotten back into yoga and have spent a lot of time reading about yoga, but not just the actual poses or yoga as an exercise. I've always felt that yoga was more for my mind than it was for my body.
When I do it I feel at peace and relaxed. My further study into yoga has gotten me thinking about peace and relaxation in my life, not just when I'm doing yoga.

I have a feeling that finding peace will mean changes in many parts of my life, but a big one that I've decided on is in my eating habits. I've decided to become a vegetarian and slowly ease into veganism. At first I thought I would still eat animal meat, but VERY, VERY rarely, and only if it was organic and if I knew that the animals had lives a humane life, but now I'm not sure if I'll do even that. It is something that I'll have to give more thought.

I don't think that being a vegetarian will be too difficult for me because I already eat animal meat so rarely, and when I do it's chicken and fish. I will be cutting out ALL meat from my diet, from here on out (well, today is actually day 2 for me). I'm looking forward to trying new recipes full of flavor and my new 4 main food groups: whole grains, vegetables, fruit and legumes.

So far, most people have been really supportive of this decision. I'm not expecting others to make the same decision, cause it's a personal choice. My reasons have more to do with saving the earth than with my love of animals, but the treatment of animals in slaughter houses is something that isn't ok with me, and me not eating meat is a small sacrifice compared to the treatment the animals I would be eating would have endured.

I'm sorry if this sounds preachy, that's not my intent. I just want to let people to know what is going on with me and the path my life is taking. My food choices tie in with my new views on spirituality and on who I want to be.

Again, I'm very grateful for all the support from my friends and family!